It's Never Easy

These people are my my most cherished possessions.  If they can be referred to as that.  I've never wanted to be anything more than be a mother.

These crazies gave me the cherished title of Mom.

I recall taking and leaving Clare in Provo, UT as an 18 year old college student.  It was so hard to walk out of her apartment.  I felt as though I had left a piece of my heart there.  She didn't have a cell phone and we didn't have a lot of money so we didn't talk nearly as often as I would've liked.  I recall laying in the back seat of the van and crying as we drove out of Utah.

 These guys make my heart happy.  They're a good group of priesthood holders and I can always count on any one of them to help me if I should need it.  Two of them take great care of my daughters and I love that most of all.

These beautiful women are my best and dearest friends.  I recall leaving Sammi in Rexburg and although I had already been through leaving one daughter it really wasn't any easier.  The only thing that made me feel better was that she had cousins so close by.

When Erin went off to Rexburg, she chose to ride out with her cousin, Lauren rather than have us take her.  But, to make it easier for her, Sammi went along and got her all settled before flying home. It was hard not having her near but she had a phone and we talked pretty much daily.  Again, she had cousins close which made me rest easier.

Two Christmases ago this was as close as we could get to having a picture taken together.  Andrew was still on his mission in Utah.  My heart if full when I get them all together.  We've had a few weeks of togetherness in the last year.  Erin would come for a visit and make me happy.  My heart always breaks when she leaves or when I'm visiting her and I have to leave, it brings tears to my eyes. Is this a sign of getting old or just getting soft?

This morning about 5:15am, these two left on a cross-country trip to take Andrew to Salt Lake City where he will be attending the LDS Business College.  He was quite nervous about going and driving across the country alone.  I offered to go with him but then Sammi stepped up and went.  This evening they are in Sydney, Nebraska.  Tomorrow they will be in Salt Lake City.  Andrew has some things he needs to do--like take a placement test, register for classes and get settled into his apartment.  Another piece of my heart is going to be living in Utah.  I know this is the best thing he could be doing and I'm so proud of the man he has become.  It isn't as hard as it was letting him go three years ago and not being able to see him for two of those years.  Still.....

I wonder if our Heavenly Father feels this way as he sends his children off to live on this earth.  Does He wonder what kind of choices they will make?  Is He concerned for their safety and well-being? Does His heart ache for us at times?  I'm sure all of the above.

I pray for my children always regardless of where they are.  I want their lives to be full and happy and joyful just as mine is.  I want them to succeed in whatever they try.  My role as mother has been more fulfilling than I ever imagined.  It has given me the proudest moments, the highest highs and the lowest of my lows.  I must say, I didn't have the lows that many parents get.  Thank you Pleshek children.  I'm your biggest fan!  I love all of you with all my heart with a capacity that just keeps enlarging.  Who knew?  Certainly not me.